I feel like I need to back up a little and have another "real" session within my blog because there are definitely things I want to touch on with my move to FL besides "pretty scenery." I constantly experience a back and forth (nothing new) with my feelings, but these feelings are in their "own box" related to what you typically feel with moving to a new state, I guess. Like, sometimes, I'll go to there store and I'm feeling so excited because I'm like, "Nobody knows me here," and it's refreshing but then, on the other side, it's that feeling of "man, nobody knows me here," and I start having these feelings that, now, I'm just this blur and I have to fight to maintain this sense of self so I don't feel like I'm some nameless person in a sea of faces. Another thing, is that it's a new place to explore and there's new stuff to do but there's not a sense of "comfortability" as in somewhere I could go, like my "usuals" in Omaha. Also, the process of starting over is just a pain in the ass. It was expensive to get a U-Haul and drive it across the country, with my car hitched in the back, and it took a few days so it was a LONG ASS RIDE. It did take me awhile to get a job and it was just an overall annoying situation to get EVERYTHING switched over (license, plates, insurance, address, etc...) and shit is NOT CHEAP to do. I brought up the fact that I was happy to have gone through with this and made this change in my life but it's only fair that I do talk about the not-so-bright side of it, without trying to make it seem like a complaint because I'm still grateful for this. My boyfriend contributed to this adventure, well, he's actually why I made this decision to come here, and I never thought I would be brave enough to pull this off but I make it work. I do struggle with homesickness, at times, but it feels good to know that I've ventured out and I've stayed out, even with all of the added stress of realizing I have to start from scratch, I know this has to be worth it.
2 Comments
Christy
12/15/2018 09:52:08 am
I have only had the pleasure of meeting you once, but that being said… If you are feeling like a blur, it is only because you are a bright flash of light and you can be blinding for a moment. What are I have only had the pleasure of meeting you once, but that being said… If you are feeling like a blur, it is only because you are a bright flash of light and you can be blinding for moment. That, my dear, is exactly what the world needs! I can see that you have a lot to offer the world, both in the sense that you have a light within, and a love that exceeds what most people know to exist, but also because you are gonna shake up the world. You have goals. You have changed you wish to see in the world, and you’re gonna light the world on fire. That’s the kind of blur you are.
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Christy
12/15/2018 09:57:12 am
I’m sorry about the repetition and the typos! I’m not sure how it got duplicated, but you can sort it out. 👍🏻
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About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
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