Disappointment. I have lived my life in disappointment and not from others either. Nope, I was always a constant disappointment to myself. I was never enough and I hated everything about me for it. I never thought I was beautiful or worth anything to anyone. I was constantly battling within myself, scrambling for SOMETHING, ANYTHING to make it through the day. What I am getting at is that disappointment taught me everything that I know. I got to know myself better when I was down and out. I was so used to being taken advantage of that I savored anything good that ever happened to me. I've always been humble about things and although, I like attention at times, I hate the attention. I can be pretty outgoing but I am so shy you wouldn't believe it. I've never thought much of myself so it is easier to put others above me, yet I can be really selfish when needed. I have experienced so much so early that nothing phases me like it would have had I not gone through that time in my life. I feel like my mind is so much "older" that some things I just can't enjoy but I am still growing and I will be the best person I can be... one day. I'll get there. I will.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
|