Until just a few days ago, I had felt like shit. I did not feel well AT ALL. I think it was because I was possibly very dehydrated and exhausted. I was exhausted because my husband snoring was keeping me up and I was getting broken, disrupted sleep (which is actually worse for you than no sleep at all or a short amount of sleep to begin with). I feel better now and finally got a little rest. Now that that is out of the way, I have a few other things to get off my chest. One, I have still not completely fallen in love with the new place & maybe I might ever. I miss the old apartment & I feel like I find different things that I really don't care for here everyday but I am still grateful for a change & the chance to be in a new space. I my whole joy was organizing & getting things in order as I envisioned them in in my mind so that it could feel like home but my hear still hasn't caught up... Now that I put that out there to clear out room in my heart, there are other news! So, I saw 2 hummingbirds last week. To others, it might not be a big deal, but it was the biggest thing for me. I have NEVER seen one in real life, up close like that before, & they actually scared the hell out of me with how close they were in the balcony area & how fast they move but they were so beautiful. Then, I seen one again the next day! This one looked like it was coming right at me so I kind of ducked for cover and ran down the steps, but it was still a happy sighting. All of that was to say how lucky (blessed?) I felt to have witnessed these beautiful birds not ONCE but TWICE within one week. I felt like they were a sign. I haven't figured out what kind of sign but it has to be message or something from the heavens... I sat around, thinking about the significance of cardinals in my family & how I just seem to keep having these encounters with all these vibrant birds. I saw a blue jay a few months ago as well & I had never seen one of those up close either, & I think I have only maybe ever seen maybe 2 in my whole life (if that, I think I'd remember something like that, right?). There was that time I seen an owl, after my brother's passing, & I read more into that & it was so fitting... Why do I keep having such occurrences with such creatures? It seems that I'm the only one to ever notice & maybe it's not a coincidence? I don't know, maybe I'm just weird & into stuff like that, but I have got to know. There has to be a reason, right?
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About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
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