I finally dug up my journals out of my storage closet and read over them, as I always do. I see that I have evolved so much, not only in my writing but in life in general. First: my writing. I was definitely "younger" and it showed. I used to do the abbreviations and smiley faces, just tacky. I had no real "flow" to my writing and my thoughts were scattered, as was my journaling. My mind will still race at a thousand miles from time to time, but as I grow, it has become a little easier to gather my mind, at least long enough to write about whatever it is. I also moved from paper to online! I still love the feeling of writing pen/pencil to paper and making it feel more personal for myself but I love that I have an online journal and I can share my stories with others. Second: my life. As I read my journals, I can't help but to read it in this annoying, little teenaged voice, almost child-like in tone, especially where I talk about Dominique (my "first love"). OH GOSH! I was SUPER, TOTALLY IN LOVE with him. I keep playing it all over and over again in my head. Did I really think I could "have" him forever!? I was ready to give him my ALL, my EVERYTHING. Well, let me not give him total credit, though I guess I was borderline obsessed, he is not the only character in my book of life. I talk about all of my woes with my different relationships in my series of journals. My eyes keep dancing over the words as I remember what I was doing and how I felt in that moment when I wrote it. It's like I am back in time and seeing everything unfold for the first time again. I like to keep my entries short so I am going to finish this up and plus I am still deeply involved with reading my journals... Good night readers, it is 2:37 AM.
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About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
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