I feel like since moving to FL, my health has gotten so much better. I mean, I did quit a few very, very bad habits once I got here so that definitely helped. My thinking was that if I were going to basically be starting over, in a whole new state, even in a new relationship, then I can't keep doing the same dumb shit that I left back in Omaha. My allergies are pretty much nonexistent and my H. Pylori doesn't flare up as often. I'm able to enjoy wine and a few drinks again without those flare ups and I like that. It was hard for awhile with my sensitive skin because my face kept breaking out and that was annoying but it's starting to finally clear so that's good news. I've also gotten back on my medication that I was on before and that's been very helpful. I don't care if people are against that anymore (that's the main reason I stopped taking them when I had first started them, I felt judged even though they helped back then, too). On the days I get homesick for Omaha, I do get a little down, and I miss my family and the very few friends I had, but I've adjusted so much and I like it here. One thing has been on my mind, though, and that's when my ex (not my husband) told me I wrote on my blog for pity and that people didn't take me seriously because I just seemed too pitiful (something like that, but he did use the word "pitiful" a few times). That really stuck with me over the years. I never felt I was being pitiful; they were my honest feelings and I was just always sad when I first started this site so I started writing as a form of therapy. I never did it for the attention or for people to feel sorry for me. I made it public because, I don't know, it was nice to know that it was out there, even if no one ever came across it or read it. Plus, I fucking can and that's all there is, really. However, people did read, and some actually wrote me to tell me how relatable my posts were for them. I am definitely repetitive in saying this but I've grown a lot, especially being in FL and the evidence is in my writing. No matter if I've stumbled over the years, I've picked myself back up. I've written many, many posts about my personal growth because growth is an everlasting process (I've said that repeatedly on here). Also, I feel like my mind is healthier since I've moved here. I really left so many things behind (my way of thinking, bad habits, etc...) in Omaha and I still have things I'm always working on but I just appreciate the chance to really start over and not have this kind of pressure to do it or rush it. I have this joy that no one can steal ever from me again.
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About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
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