Maybe it's because of the passing of my grandma, but I am definitely feeling a change in myself. I think it might have to do with her passing that I've been more withdrawn and a little more hostile (in a good way, if that can be possible?), and I just feel like I think more clearly. I realized that I don't really care for the "friends" I have. I would very much rather be drinking a beer, hanging out with my family, not that I needed a reason to do or feel that way but I go to work and dread it and I see that I don't connect with any of the girls I work with. I just feel like I see so much more that I want for myself.Its been nice having "ME" time at home, and not stressed about going to go meet up with my friends or whatever. I realized that after my next trip, I decided to probably leave my job to find something else. I need to branch out and do other things and not stay at my job out of comfort. I also do need to get out of this "funk" and find new friends that I actually care for and connect on a deeper level with. There are so many things I want to and need to do and I can't wait to cut unnecessary people out my life and bring new, positive energy in. I can't wait to find a new job, one that I enjoy waking up going to. I miss my grandma dearly and Lord knows I would give my life to have her back here with us but her passing has opened my eyes and I will be forever grateful to have had such a wonderful woman in my life thru both life and death, still teaching me things. I feel like I'm kind of mumbling and not making complete sense in this post but it is almost 6 AM as I write this, but I know what I mean. I feel this change coming over me and I'm embracing it because this is so beautiful. Good night or morning, whatever, readers.
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About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
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