I've been letting MONTHS go by where I disappear from here and I really need to stop doing that. I LOVE my site and I do get sad, in my heart, when I feel as if I've just "abandoned my baby," and it's not healthy for me, either, because I haven't used the space I've created to express myself. Well, I've taken a bit of a hiatus to process these last few months and resist the urge to stay in a rut. Here's the latest: I've separated from my husband and we are in the process of dissolving our marriage and I've moved out of our apartment and even moved out of the state for a new adventure. There are some other things I'm not willing to share on here quite yet but it feels somewhat relieving to have written that... After almost 6 years, I ended our relationship and I reflect on that daily. I'm not going to get on here and bash my husband because I was the one that made the decision to leave and we ended on decent terms. Since making the move, I've struggled to find a sense of self, in a way, because since I was 18, 19 years old, he was all I had known coming into my adolescent life. I remember crying and telling him that I was scared because I wasn't sure what really comes next and he told me there was nothing to be afraid of. Also, it's important for me to say that, although I chose to ultimately break it off, it did broke my heart, too. It was weird to think that after all this time, my routine with my husband, whom I married right after high school and the military, whom I'd made trips to visit him in college in MS and whom I'd ever shared my first apartment with and legally changed my last name as his was over and I had to embark on the next stage without him... Lastly, so I can just be finished with this post, moving out of the state I'd ever called home was the most terrifying, most exhilarating thing to experience and everyday I wake up in my new surrounding still in disbelief. I wasn't ready for the whirlwind of emotions to stir in my soul over the past months and I've had to really figure some things out.
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About the AuthorI got the idea to create a blog in December 2014 on a random type of day.Writing has always been therapeutic; the only way I could communicate clearly, in actual words instead of struggling to unscramble the swirl of images, metaphors & analogies that is my thought process. In short, Archives
February 2020
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